50 Answers

My answers to “50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind” from “Marc and Angel Hack Life” (Because it’s an awesome blog.)

1. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?
Sometimes I forget I’m only 27. I start worrying about how I’m going to retire and deal with some unknown, future “major health event.” Most of my closest friends are in their mid-to-late thirties, so I guess that’s how old I’d be.

2. Which is worse, failing or never trying?
Never trying, of course. Failing is only a temporary setback. If you don’t try, you’ll never know if you could have won or not.

3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?
Because we’re silly, silly little apes. Also, sometimes you’ve got to do things you don’t like in order to obtain the best result. I’m also a workaholic.

4. When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?
How should a voice actor and a writer answer this? :D

5. What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world?
I’d make it where no one would have to do any work they don’t want to do. People would be able to follow their passions wholeheartedly no matter what.

6. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?
I’ve given this one a lot of thought. “Experimental Creative Professional” Would be my job title. What would I do? Try new art forms and create like crazy!

7. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?
Everyone does a little of both by necessity, in my opinion. That being said, I try to never settle. I do everything I can to do only that which I believe in.

8. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?
I probably wouldn’t, honestly. If I was able to travel into the future and discovered I would only live to 40, I’d probably spend a few years in a funk playing video games, then dive into my writing with a renewed passion. I still wouldn’t go skydiving or bungie jumping. I like being a shut-in hermit too much.

9. To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?
Almost wholly, though life is inherently filled with uncontrollable events that have grand, far-reaching consequences (like the deaths of friends/relatives.) I have free will within the ever rolling ocean of fate and destiny.

10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?
Doing the right things.

11. You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do?
Stick up for the friend under siege. Also, I’d question why I’m friends with people who are so quick to whip out distasteful and unjustified criticism.

12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?
Nobody really knows what they’re doing or what’s going on. Everyone is always winging it in everything.

13. Would you break the law to save a loved one?
Yes. Nothing is more important than loved ones.

14. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?
Not sure. The only thing that comes to mind is maybe the way I can look at paintings that are just a canvas coated with paint of a single color and decide how some are art and others are just laziness.

15. What’s something you know you do differently than most people?
Drink soda. I used to read while eating lunch in high school and developed a habit where I drink from the right side of my mouth (instead of straight on.) Also, I collect art and books written by virtually unknown authors and artists (and actually read them.)

16. How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy?
Because it takes all kinds to make a world. Diversity is one of the best things about humanity.

17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back?
Really want to do? Nothing holds me back from things I really want to do. Things I kind of want to do (like being rich or visiting Australia) take time and money.

18. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?
Probably, but if I am, I can’t see it. Whenever I realize it’s time to move on (in some way) I cut and run. Baggage sucks to carry around. Actually, now that I think about it, there is that recurring depression thing that pops up. I’m doing a lot better in the last year though, thanks to my beautiful wife-to-be, Desiree.

19. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?
Had to? There are lots of states I can think of I’d like to move to (like Washington or Hawaii.) I like California lots, but I’ve considered other states for reasons like job availability, etc.

20. Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?
Sometimes I do, but only when I’m nervous (crosswalks too.) I never thought it made the things go faster though. It’s more like a double/triple/quadruple check kind of thing, making sure the machine understands and remembers. Yeah, it’s silly.

21. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?
That’s a hard one. Worried genius, because maybe I could manage to make more of a positive difference in society than if I was a joyful simpleton.

22. Why are you, you?
This question could be answered on so many levels. I believe I am me because I have things to do, things to learn, and the vehicle of my body will last exactly as long as I need it to to do the things I need to do (whatever they are.)

23. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?
Mostly, yes. I wish I could do more, employ/treat/donate more to the people I care about in their times of need or low spirits.

24. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?
The second one, because that’s one of the loneliest places to be in one’s life.

25. What are you most grateful for?
My wife-to-be, Desiree. Also, my health, my success as an artist, living in a country where I can write what I want (mostly) and not get thrown in jail, and my ability to read.

26. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?
Lose all of my old memories. Life would be fresh and new. Never being able to make new memories could lead to psychologically excruciating experiences.

27. Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first?
Probably. I take everything anyone says with a grain of salt, more or less, and find that knowledge is, by its very nature, fluid.

28. Has your greatest fear ever come true?
My greatest fears usually involve people or pets dying. I’ve only had to face that fear a few times. I used to be terrified of alien abductions, but I kind of wish I could experience one now. Might be fun! :D

29. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?
Another wide-open one. I remember most of the times I was really upset, no matter how far back they were. Usually they don’t matter a year or so down the line, but there are a few I still think about and fester over periodically. I think that’s normal and human.

30. What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special?
There are so many! Fishing with my dad, playing with friends, old box forts, hiking though cow fields with friends, playing with pets, playing D&D for the first time…

31. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?
Always? Probably the most moving moment was the whole weekend Dez and I spent primitive camping on the Lost Coast last year. :D

32. If not now, then when?
First thing in the morning. After coffee and Minecraft.

33. If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?
Depends on how far you’re willing to take it, how many friends/family/strangers you’re willing to selfishly hurt in the process and how much you love minimalism. I do all I can without hurting those I care about.

34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?
Only if that conversation includes a kiss. :D

35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?
Because the people who claim to follow those religions are either purposefully blind to or ignorant of the messages of peace usually present within them.

36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?
Probably. Sadistic behavior (hurting people for fun) is something I would consider to be evil.

37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?
Nope! I’d use the money to build it up even more (because I’m self-employed.)

38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?
That’s a hard one. An even mix of the two? Lots of work I really would enjoy doing followed by a period of nothing important to do at all but love, live and explore.

39. Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before?
Everyday is a fresh new opportunity. Monotony only exists if you let things slide into a groove you’re uncomfortable with.

40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?
I tend to live this way. Now, literally marching off into literal darkness? Dude, I grew up in the woods. I’ve chased mountain lions, dodged rattlesnakes and scared bears out of dumpsters. There’s no way I’m going to wander around blind in the woods at night.

41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?
My beautiful Desiree. I’m such a hermit, I’d probably contact everyone else through the phone (and/or FB) though.

42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?
Man, that’s a hard one. I could give a damn about being attractive, but famous? Fame can be very useful. Still, it is ten years. Damn. How long am I supposed to live again? Oh right, I plan to live forever or die trying. Where is that damn singularity? I’m ready to be a techno-borg-shaman bathing in the light of knowledge forever.

43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living?
Being alive is breathing. Truly living is having reasons to smile while you’re breathing.

44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?
Immediately. Calculate risks and rewards on your feet, while you’re doing what you know is right.

45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?
Because mistakes are equated (mentally) with failure, and failure hurts. Failures (academically) follow us forever, make people look down on us and make us ineligable (in theory) for a truly happy and nice life. It feels much better to learn our lessons by succeeding against all odds.

46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?
Besides just now? Only when I get the flu.

48. What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?
I love helping fellow artists/creative people. I live my life trying to make the world better for artists, writers and creative people in any way I can.

49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that?
I’ll remember that I was taking a wonderful week off with my sweetie this week. Other than that, my weeks and days usually just blur into a fun mass of projects worked on and things created.

50. Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?
Some decisions will always be made for me (decisions made by celestial, governmental or corporate powers that be.)
Other decisions… I tend to always try to take a consensus, because the people I love have diverse and different opinions and points of view that matter to me.

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